Attacking Anxiety

Imagine yourself as a soldier in a Roman legion. You have the red tassel, majestic armor, sharp sword, and a sculpted physicality to hold it all up. You are standing in formation, ready for battle. Your body is surging with adrenaline. Your veins and muscles feel confident and ready for anything that might come. With a piercing shout, your commander shouts, “Charge!”. You thrust your sword up in the air and begin charging as fast as you can at the enemy. You then run as fast as you possibly can, until you slam into the wall of enemy soldiers in front of you. You both fall back from the violence of the collision. When the battle is over, only a few of your friends remain standing, and you sit down, physically and emotionally exhausted from the intensity of the situation.

This introductory scenario is meant to serve as a metaphor for the concept of “attacking anxiety.” Attacking anxiety, however, is a mental approach to anxiety reduction that seems not to be a good one. Indeed, the best way to move past mental health disorders, including social anxiety, and into a healthy frame of mind that is balanced and enjoyable, is by letting go of the anxiety and relying on powers outside of one's self (see ASN's Letting Go, Accepting Help, and Accepting Anxiety for similar information regarding this topic).

For whatever reason, people in the world have become indoctrinated with the belief that attacking and constant pressure and aggression leads to victory. It is unclear whether this is a natural attitude that arises in people, or if it is a trait learned from society. But nonetheless, the evidence of the prevalence of this attitude is all around us. Take a look at any sport, for example; is there any sport where the players are taught to let go, relax, and enjoy the game, or do most sports rely on aggression and competitiveness in order for one team to get what they want? The good teams always have a great defense that places high pressure on the offense, forcing mistakes so that the team with the superior defense usually wins. This seems to work well in the realm of physical competition, although using an attitude of letting go seems to sometimes be of help for some players.

It is interesting to analyze what happened in the introductory scenario. The soldiers on the offensive attacked the soldiers on the defensive, and there was a violent collision that resulted in great damage to both sides. This is exactly how attacking anxiety works. Anyone who charges him or her self with the attitude of attacking anxiety will find that great repercussions waiting for them as the outcome. While not as violent and destructive as the outcomes of a battle, the repercussions here are still quite damaging. Charging in at anxiety like a soldier into battle leads to a violent confrontation. If the charge is successful, the enemy (anxiety), will bounce back. However, it has required great emotional resources from the individual to make the charge, and now that the battle is over, only more emotional resources will be required to recover. In concrete terms, this means that great anxiety about engaging in the situation was required, and even though the charge was victorious and the anxiety was overcome, more anxiety will be occurring in order to recuperate from this battle. In addition, more anxiety will be required in order to fight additional battles in the future. The process of attacking anxiety, therefore, will in turn cause great anxiety. While it is possible to overcome anxiety via this method just as it is possible to overcome enemies via physical battles, it nonetheless comes at a very high cost to the individual initiating the battle.

A method that is more effective at reducing anxiety and that does not cost the individual anything at all is the attitude of letting go. Letting go means that the individual is not attacking anxiety with all his or her emotional might. Instead, he or she is surrendering the battle to a power or force outside him or her self. This means that there is no battle for the individual involved, and therefore, no emotional resources are required of this person. In fact, all this person has to do is show up – no action is actually required of him or her other than to keep redirecting his or her thoughts from anxious ones to ones of letting go. For example, instead of thinking, “What if I don’t talk to this person that I want to talk to?,” a person is much better served by thinking, “I’ll just go ahead and talk to this person, and whatever happens, happens.” The attitude of letting go does not care at all about the outcome. Attacking anxiety, however, is all about the outcome and as noted before creates much anxiety when trying to cure the anxiety itself.

Now imagine that same scenario where you are a Roman soldier preparing for battle again, but this time you are letting go instead of attacking. Your commander is giving an inspiring speech to your legion. As he finishes, everyone begins cheering in unison, and the adrenaline begins to surge through your body. The commander, however, rather than shouting, “Charge!” instead shouts, “Let go!” As soon as all the soldiers hear this, they drop their swords, shields, and take off their armor. Everyone sits down on the ground and the commander raises the white flag.

This metaphor shows exactly how letting go works; instead of taking the initiative and confronting things directly, the person who lets go simply gives up and lets the anxiety pass by. In terms of war and physical confrontation, letting go makes absolutely no sense at all. However, emotionally speaking, this is exactly what is happening when someone is letting go. The person who lets go surrenders any emotional value that he or she places in the outcome. He or she simply gives the best possible effort and deals with the consequences of his or her actions, whatever those are. Notice that in this second metaphor there is no violent confrontation. All the emotional energy that was displayed in the first metaphor is simply nonexistent in the second metaphor. Whatever the outcome is, the person is able to deal with it, even if the outcome is not a desirable one. Because there is less emphasis on one’s own effort and because faith is instead placed in the belief that whatever happens, happens only to serve one’s good, anxiety is greatly reduced.

And this is exactly why attacking anxiety is not an effective method for anxiety reduction. Very simply put, attacking anxiety results in a collision, an emotional power struggle, while letting go of anxiety results in one letting anxiety run its course to wherever it wants to go next. The more one lets go of anxiety, the lesser anxiety he or she experiences because it moves through the person and is no longer bottled up. The next time that you are attempting to confront an anxiety-provoking situation, try your hardest to let go of the outcome that you desire and any methods that you might think to use for attacking anxiety.

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