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Accepting Anxiety

Anxiety’s effects on one’s life can be very detrimental, and those who are severely anxious, including those with social anxiety who are seeking anxiety support, know these effects firsthand. A person may be in his or her mid twenties and never have had a significant relationship, friend, or job. The tendency of people who have had this severe anxiety their entire lives is to say, “I can’t take it anymore! I don’t want this! I never asked for it and I have been fighting every day of my life just for the little bit that I do have!” Given the experience of people who find themselves saying this or things similar to it, this is a perfectly reasonable response. How should anyone feel who has been overwhelmed by struggles in their life?

But, while it is healthy to express this frustration, at some point one needs to move on from this mindset, as it only serves to maintain or increase one’s anxiety level. Trying to fight the anxiety off with thinking along these lines only causes the person to worry more about anxiety, or it makes that person feel like more of a failure after losing the battle. One strategy that can be very effective in reducing anxiety is simply accepting the fact that one is anxious at this particular given moment. While this condition and its effects were not requested, they are nonetheless present in this person’s life, and this level of anxiety is simply who the person is at this point in time. No value should be assigned to one’s current state; it is not good or bad; it is simply the state that the person is in now. But, when that anxiety attack comes when a person is trying to step out of his or her comfort zone and work a job, find a relationship, or make new friends, it can be very beneficial to simply accept that intense anxiety. Trying to fight it off is like trying to think away a broken leg; try as one might, it will never work. Simply accept that this intense anxiety is going to happen no matter what. Let the anxiety run its course and cause the physiological symptoms that it usually does. Next, since one is not fighting with the anxiety, it will simply pass and go on its way. Relaxation will come next, and everything will be okay.

Fighting anxiety is like building a large dam to hold up water, but instead of a sturdy dam, the dam is instead made out of a flimsy material, plaster. There is no way that the dam can hold up the water in this case. Accepting the anxiety is like sitting in a tree and watching floodwaters flow by. They are intimidating and cause one to be slightly nervous, but as long as one remains in the tree, the flood will simply flow by until it simply dries up and causes no more problems.

Many anxiety sufferers simply think that they have been unfairly treated (which is the case sometimes) and that somehow they should not be at the point in life that they are in. This is a massive barrier to progress. Once one accepts the fact that he or she is where he or she is, then progress can be made. Acceptance can be a huge key in many cases. Good luck to those out there seeking anxiety support and relief from social anxiety!

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